Envy

I am pretty sure that at one point of our lives, we feel envious of something/someone before. Be it because that someone has better things than you, or is able to do something you can't do, and so on. I used to be an envious person. Someone who gets jealous easily (in terms of envy, not relationship wise heh). Last night... I was thinking about it, about how much envious I could get in the past.

I remember when I was in primary school, I got jealous a lot of my "sporty" friends. My primary school, Pei Tong Primary was quite famous for its rugby team when I was studying there. I was never a sporty person, so joining rugby was not in my mind. But seeing how athletic and sporty some of my friends were, I sometimes asked myself "why can't I be like them?"

There was one time I remember during sports' day, my school's sport house (Ruby FTW!) was choosing people to represent the house in events. I think it was a running event, and I decided to try my shot to join the event. We were asked to run from point A and point B and... Of course I was the last person to reach point B. So my teacher kindly puts me as a reserve. It was cool.

In secondary school I was not a sporty person either. But I did enjoy sport as always. I love the times during PE when we would play soccer, handball, floorball and so on. Until NAPFA test arrives, when I would fail thanks to my pull up. Actually I got a bronze in sec one, but for sec two I was excused as I just got out from the hospital that time. And I failed in sec three and four, thanks to pull up and standing broad jump. It was irritating because the other guys only fail the either (and not both).

Even in poly, I did have my fair share of feeling envious of other people. For example how strong people are when I'm exercising at the gym. How sporty people can get, and how hunky these guys look.

Until one day, when I was talking to a friend of mine. I told her how envy I am when I see these people. It's like I can never be like them. Of course she joked by saying it's because I don't exercise as often as these people HAHA. Which is true obviously.

But she also told me one thing. She said the people you see at the gym can lift more than you, they are hunkier and more handsome than you. But can they play the clarinet? Do they know anything about photography? Do they know the different kind of immune cells in their body?

And what she said made me think a lot. Well yes, we have to be happy with who we are. Just because you can't do something that someone can, doesn't mean you are on the disadvantaged side. Or it doesn't mean you're "worst" than them. Just like my secondary school motto says, everyone is unique, all cam succeed. We all have our own special talents and ability that make us who we are.

Ever since she told me that, I have learned to be less envious of other people - but to be happier with who I am, and to accept and love who I am as a person. Of course I don't "instantly brag" about myself. But I've come to a realisation that being envious is... Pretty much useless hah. 

Be happy with who you are. And be who you want to be. If you decide that sports isn't for you, don't worry. Just be better and keep on going better with what you love doing. If you feel that you want to be a sporty person, then by all means go ahead and try things out.

Keep on doing what you love. You can do what trillions can't do - and that is being you.