Absolute vs Relative

I love Mingyur Rinpoche's videos! They're fun and easy to understand :)

I was watching Mingyur Rinpoche's new video last night about the second thought (of the four thoughts) on YouTube. He mentioned about the absolute and relative reality again, and well this is something that I have been intriguing about. Cause I couldn't really grasp the understanding about the fact that absolute reality is impermanent, and that relative reality is permanent. But today, I understood.

So in Buddhism, there are two different "realities". The first is absolute reality. You can say that it is what things are. Secondly it's relative reality, which is something that we perceive. Absolute reality is impermanent, always changing, and constantly in change due to causes and conditions. Relative reality is permanent, long-lasting and stable. Not because that's their nature, but because our mind is so fixated to believe whatever we perceive to be true. When they may necessarily not.

To give an example, this is my take on the two realities. A very common example.

Say you called someone on your phone for a few times and they didn't pick it up. And then you start thinking why won't this person pick up your call? You start to imagine things like they don't want to pick it up, they are doing something else and so on and forth. Then they called you and apologised, saying that they didn't pick it up cause they were in the toilet. Err yes. So the absolute reality is that this someone didn't pick up their phone because they're in the toilet, while relative reality is that they're is avoiding you. See the difference? And see the danger if we constantly cling onto them!

For me, I've seen that everything in life is impermanent. We are in a constant change, and every moment is different from the next. Every scenario, everything that happened is in a constant change from one state to another. And this change is caused by different things in life. I like to distract myself by thinking the good "changes" and not trap myself in lots of negativity.

It is difficult, but it can be done.

I'm someone who loves to overthink. I think a lot of unnecessary thoughts that I shouldn't even think of. Meditation helps a lot, because it helps me to realise the nature of our mind and the nature of everything in life. Chanting helps a lot too, because they remind myself that everything in life is empty of nature. Constantly changing, but not necessarily defiled, purified, added or subtracted (Heart Sutra).

I think one of the hardest thing to do in Buddhism (or in life) is to practice what we preach. I mean I've been reciting sutras for almost a year, everyday, and at times I find it difficult to practice what the sutra said to me. Yes, slowly but surely, I want to follow the footsteps of Boddhisatvas and the Buddha himself and I hope to help others who are suffering. Although sometimes I'm lost of what to do.

Today has been another emotionally draining day. I'm feeling kind of lost. Not knowing what to do or what to feel. Not knowing where to go next and where to stay. Perhaps I've been living in my relative reality for too long. And maybe it's time for me to go back to my absolute reality.