Four

Yesterday was the 25th of May. A pretty special day for me ever since 4 years ago. Yep the day I returned home for good from Singapore! It was a day I used to dread back while I was still in Singapore. A day filled with uncertainties, sadness and worries. But well fast forward four years later, it has become a normal day. But also a day where I contemplate a lot about life, and my journey so far.

I have learned a lot in the past four years. So much, in fact, that I feel I've learned more in these four than the previous years haha. I've learned about life itself, and also a lot about myself. Discovering sides of me that I've never seen before, and also creating new sides of me. Uh huh.

I realised that as we grow up, we will experience many definition changes. We will redefine things that we think about, the things that we do. We will discover what matters and what doesn't, what is important and what isn't. We will prioritise things and so on. What we believed to be true may not be true after all. What we believed to never exist, suddenly appears in front of our eyes.

Life is an amazing journey of discoveries I suppose. Constant discoveries that we found and we apply and carry on in our lives. I think one of the greatest lessons and bliss that I found in these four years, is the meaning of living in the moment. The meaning of living in the present. About worrying less and "being here". Finding out the purpose of life and making full use of whatever we have here. The time, place and so on. Taking control of your life, your current life, wherever you are.

Taking control of it instead of simply just letting senseless hopes and fears take over your life.

I used to worry about the future, and hold on to the hopes and dreams that I have. Sure it is an amazing place we paint and loved to be in. But I realised something is more exciting and beautiful than that: Building it right here in the present! I used to also dwell in regrets. Caught in a dream about how my life will be if I were to know my regrets before the came knocking on my door to greet me.

I suppose... The present moment is like a lighthouse. Guiding us to get out of this limbo, this spot. It reminds us that we are ultimately the captain of this boat. We can take control of whatever we have now. The boat, the wind, the sun and everything else to bring us to wherever we want to go. Our destination won't bring itself to us! We gotta sail there. From here to there hah.

I suppose there is that sense of freedom as we plunge into the present moment. A place where we are unchained by the past and unbound from the future. I hope to be here, mindfully, all the time, as we make our way forward. Because it is truly a beautiful place we have to go through.

Well. It's been an interesting four years, seeing how my life unfolds. 

And here's to all the beautiful places we will go :)