Baffled

Tangled up, confused.

Photography by Yours Truly

Sometimes I just want to straighten everything

Today was... Alright I think. Heh, guess you can tell I'm sort of moody from the first sentence. Leave alone, the tittle. Well yeah I'm baffled. Shall talk about that later on.

Today was alright I guess. Had my VIVA test for Bimmun. Not sure if I do well or not but I do know I left out some few points and missed out some stuff. Played the game ABC (?) with Rebekah, Candy and Lizzie. Bleah I suck at shooting balls. Been stuck all my life at the 3rd - 7th position all the time :/

Stopped playing for a while and get a drink. Some of the CLS people came and they started playing as well. I decided to head to the library instead. Cause I didn't bring an extra shirt and I don't wanna be sticky and sweaty. Haha sorry, and so please understand.

Anyway in the library, played some games with Syazwani, Nivedha, Ying Ting and Shahnaz. Ying ying joined us later. Was sort of reading my Biochem notes as well. Had a lot of fun with them haha. Been such a long time I played those boardgames.

Headed for Dr E lesson (which is more of a consultation though). This is when I have this "ting" feeling about something. It just happened so suddenly. Like somehow somewhat all that come into sense. I just can't help but to stop and think. It really sucks. It bothers me till anatomy lesson. Oh well. I just have to go on, and move on I guess.

And I'm a bit unhappy right now. Cause suddenly, there's band tomorrow. Like what? And worst part I was informed in like 10 PM. It's at night, I already planned my plans for tomorrow since Monday when I know that there is no band tomorrow and now? There's band. Sigh.

I guess this is what we have to live alongside with. This always happens when I was in Tanglin too. The sudden pop outs that something's gonna take place, and somehow somewhat everything is ruined. I hate it, like really. Why does this always happen?

Anyway I'm going to get a good break tonight. Thanks a lot, my plan tomorrow has been re-shifted totally. So I have my new plans now so I'm going to get a great break tonight. Don't think I'm such a complaining ass. I'm sure you know how I feel too.

We are all selfish in our own different ways. There is not way we can deny, it's life.

Losing it

Guess what, I'm such a bad boy for blogging in class now! Oh well, anyway decided not to do the Maths tutorials cause I'm not too sure about the chapter. So spent this time asking Mr Cheng about the topic and whew I understand it much better. Gonna do the tutorials some other time, once I fully understand it.

Anyway today had my AP Chem CA2. It was okay I guess. Freak, I totally forgotten about chapter 5 cause I focussed to much on chapter 6 (which is harder). So well... Hopefully I can get good marks.

And band was fun yesterday. I'll be having band again later so gonna stayback in school till band and I wanna study. Planning to study Biochem where I'll be having a test next week. Oh boy. I don't know why but somehow somewhat, everything just becomes tough SUDDENLY.

I was literally stunned during Bimmun lecture. I didn't get what Miss Joanne said. I understood a little, and I hate it. I hate the fact that I didn't get a 100% of the lecture. It's sort of irritating. Like you really really wanna get it but you ended up not getting it. Sigh, that's why my title says I'm losing it. Hopefully I won't continue to lose it.

Alright that's all for today. Going home late tonight so that's why I blog now. I have to study. Arrrgh, Okay see you.

Glad everyone sees my hair with a smile :)

Hair for Hope 2010

Saeyeoh, Nivedha and me after shave!

Photography by me I think?

Oh man Hair for Hope 2010 is so awesome! :D

Alrighty people... I have shaved for Hair for Hope 2010! Awesome or what hehe. Anyway Saeyeoh and me shaved, oh not forgetting one of her senior as well. Another female! Hats off to the two of them! :D

So anyway met Saeyeoh at Vivo at 10. Okay I was like ten minutes late. Sorry ... It was so painful to see my bus left in front of me as I was crossing the road. Anyway when I reached there, the queue was... Wow! I think there were about 20-30 people in front of us. Heh the person emailed me to be there by about eleven. Wow, no way haha!

Ahpa told me the estimated waiting time was 2-3 hours. Well indeed it was true. We queued for about 2h 45m (including registration) and got shaved at about 1 plus PM. It was really nice. The place and the event itself was so inspirational. Seriously, hats off to those ladies with long hair (or short) who shaved! I'm just awed really.

So well we shaved and tadah!

Met Nivedha and we took some pictures (on Facebook) and then we went for lunch. Saeyeoh went with her friend and I went home, while Nivedha went to help out in her booth. Busy girl she is eh? Hehe. Anyway I played at her booth and I got myself a pencil hoho.

On my way home, and in vivo, I was literally being stared by others. Like hey what's wrong? So Hair for Hope certainly made me realise how those cancer patients (especially children) felt as they go for chemotherapy.

Anyway, I dedicate this haircut to these people. My grandpa, grandma, aunt, uncle, my best friend's dad and one of my good friend in my class. They have touched me (especially my aunt) to do this. I am really touched, also, by the others who participated in this event. And guess what? I'm coming back again next year most probably. As an online shavee, to cut queue time haha!

Alrighty that's all for today. Time to go and study AP Chem tonight or I'll suffer on Tue seriously. Anyway I have a feeling that I'll screw this test... Sigh, never mind lets go!

Last thought of HfH:

People may think it will be embarrassing to have our hair shaved. But I feel that, if those cancer patients (especially children) can withstand the pain of chemotheraphy, and embraced their time for it, I'm sure we can withstand the embarrassment we get :)

Banner

Hmm.. I wanna go to another shoot-shoot outing

Lomography by Yours Truly

Taken at Chinese Garden

Today was an awesome Saturday. Been such a looooooong time since I actually went back to school for something. Usually I would slack my Saturday away. Poof, woosh, gone with the wind. But today I went back to school for band. It was the AGM, then a little IBM practice, then painting banner time!

I love the painting banner time. It was, I feel, the first ever time that the year ones actually get together to do something TOGETHER. It was awesome. I love the banner too! Pictures uploading in Facebook... I don't know when lol. But will upload! Hehe

The painting time was fun too, get to mingle around with new people. And some funny and awkward moments as well. Love the part where Syazwan touched the socks of Muz? I don't know haha. That moment was so funny.

Anyway, I'm really looking forward to next Sunday! My first ever band concert where I will be performing. It's like one of my dreams coming true. Love it! One thing to strike off from my list of things to do before I die haha. And hey, I'm looking forward to tomorrow too!

Cause it's Hair for Hope! Finally the day has arrived! Haha. And oh have I told you that Ahpa is coming along too? Woohoo the more the merrier isn't it :D

So lets say good bye to my hair for this time. Tomorrow I will have a new hairstyle! Haha. I really don't mind doing it :)

Alright then I guess that's all for today. Thinking whether I should go and study later or not... Cause I'm sort of tired but yet I'm having a test on Tuesday. Gosh alright, see ya!

So excited for tomorrow! :D

Angela Aki - 手紙 ～拝啓 十五の君へ～ (Letter to the 15 year old me)

Greetings,
You who are reading this, where are you and what are you doing now?

I’m 15 and there’s something worrying me
That I can’t talk to anyone about

But if I address a letter to my future self
Then I know I’ll be able to speak my mind

I feel like giving up now, I feel like crying, I feel like I’m going to disappear
Whose words should I trust as I move forward?
My one and only heart has broken into pieces time and time again
And I’m living through painful times now
I’m living in the present

Greetings,
Thank you, I have something to tell your 15 year old self

If you keep asking yourself why and where you should go
The answer will become clear

The seas of adolescence can be rough
But keep sailing the boat that is your dream towards tomorrow’s shore

Don’t give up now, don’t cry, when you feel like you’re going to disappear
Then you should trust your own voice and move forward
Even an adult like me gets hurt and has sleepless nights
But I’m living in the bittersweet present

Everything in life has meaning
So don’t be afraid to follow your dream
Keep on believing

I feel like giving up now, I feel like crying, I feel like I’m going to disappear
Whose words should I trust as I move forward?
Ah, don’t give up now, don’t cry, when you feel like you’re going to disappear
Then you should trust your own voice and move forward
No matter what stage of your life you’re in
You can’t get by without going through sadness
Show me a smile, let’s live in the present
Let’s live in the present

Greetings,
I pray that you who are reading this
Will be happy

This song is just so touching! :'(

Think of Me

All I need is a place to let me relax

Photography by Yours Truly

I've always dreamt of a great escape.

Whew, it's been an hour since I reached home from band. Really tired but thank God I came home first before heading for band, and took a nap! A little is better than nothing isn't it. Anyway supposed to go for the international CLS student walk thingy but decided not to, cause if I went, I'll be late for band.

And I'm holding the scores for the third clarinets, if I'm late, they can't play. And anyway if I leave early, then I feel I'm wasting my time there (as in if I went for the walk for an hour or so? Then leave) so decided to skip it. I felt really guilty but I'm sorry, I really can't go.

Today was alright. Damn it, I was feeling so sleepy this morning. I fell asleep for both Math and Anatomy. It sucks I know. I hate sleepy mornings. I don't usually feel sleepy during morning, today was an exception. Gotta review my sleeping time.

Anyway band was alright. I love the fact that I'm getting more interactions with others now. Or perhaps I was just feeling too sensitive about it last time. It's kind of unbelievable that we are 4 practices away from IBM. And 10 more days to it. And yeah we don't sound good yet. I have to practice more. I can't let the audience down right?

Alrighty I guess that's all for today. I'm going to study Chemistry perhaps, since I'll be having band on Monday, which ends late. And I'm having a day camp on Saturday. Whhhebwbbeeer. I'm really busy huh.

Okay that's all for today! I better get going so see ya!

Don't drink and drive. And don't drink and take a bus.

Different

These are the pictures from the outings

Photography by stranger, and Haagen Daz guy

Thanks for the two days people!

Hello people, quick bloggy again. Time to revise my stuff for tomorrow's lesson. It's uhh about 8 more weeks to my semestral exam. Can't afford to lose time eh so... Gotta start my revision!

Anyway today was a normal Sunday. I hate Sundays. Not only that I know tomorrow is a Monday, but I seriously have no mood to do so much things. Slack is the only word that pops out in my mind. I know it really sucks. Thankfully I'm having the mood to revise Bimmun, and perhaps a little of AP chem.

So since I was having no mood at all, I have decided to go and clean up my room! It was really pretty messy so yeah. Didn't really realise that cleaning up my room can be so sentimental. Being reunited with things like my Math notes, my O Level entry proof, some Swedish and Norway coins and more stuff.

All I did was to hold them in my hands and smile.

In the evening met Jesher, Victor, Nigel, Jeremy Yeo together in Holland. So nice of Vic to plan this outing to celebrate my birthday. Thanks a lot! Ate at "Everything With Fries". Love the restaurant, love the ambience and great food as well.

After that headed for Haagen Daz for out Fondue! I decided to ask them to come here cause last time we had it too. So kind of brings back memories. Life is really funny. Sometimes I wonder why but we are all so different now. So different from who we were last time and who we are now.

And I don't know why but I feel I am different from them too. Not that I don't like it or what. But i just feel I'm different from them. Haha okay cut this. I just feel weird and different. Full stop.

Okay that's all for my bloggy. Time to go and study! See ya

Don't be afraid to be different. For we are who we are.

Happy birthday to me :)

Look how I've transitioned.

Photography by Yours Truly

A small boy, a teen, and a young adult now.

Firstly....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Wow I'm really old now. 18 years of my life has passed. It's been 18 years since I breathed my first gush of oxygen into my lungs and let it circulate into my blood. Wow.... Awesome or what. Anyway I'm really happy that I'm 18 now! Not that I'm able to watch M18 movies but... HAHAHA

I'm really happy because it shows how I have endured 18 years of my life. It may be considered as something short and unimportant. But to me every moment of my life is something. No matter how unimportant it is. It still matters to me. And this 18 years of my life, have taught me lots of things. And it shall carry on till I heave my last breath.

Today was an awesome day. Met up with Neal, Jes and Ade at Clementi. After spending sometime with no luck of getting a taxi, we finally cabbed to Taka with a very very interesting driver haha. Ate at Coca? Not bad for a steamboat. But I think made a wrong choice for the soup base...

Anyway after that we decided to go to Marina Barrage, since only Jeslyn had only went there and we have not. It was awesome there. Lots of people, blue skies and... We can "sneak" to see the NDP preview! :D

Left the barrage at night at about 8 plus. Seriously, they must increase the number of intervals of busses that leave for MB and Marina bay station. Seriously. And something went wrong with Neal's tummy so he decided to go home first. Get well soon!

Met up with Wei Qi to eat dinner at the HK cafe. And we talked about lots of things hehe. And after that home sweet home!

Sigh, time flies really really quickly. My 18 years of my life fly at this really really quick time huh? So far this is the best birthday I've celebrated in Singapore! Cause I remember when I was in sec 1, I was in band practice for a concert the next day. When I was in sec 2, I was admitted to hospital, thanks to my spleen infection. When I was in sec 3, I had a RHD skit rehearsal. And last year, I had a throat infection haha!

It's been a wonderful, bittersweet, lovable, awesome, amazing 18 years. The dictionary won't be able to describe it, for it is a mixture of words, rather than single words being put together. Life is just awesome and amazing at times. I was born, and I am now 18. Weird huh?

Alright that's all for this wonderful birthday! Would like to thank my family, the 199 of you who had wished me through facebook and those who wished me through phones. And everyone who had made this day such an awesome day! Really tired now so... Bed time! See ya :D

Life is amazing and funny.

POP

Can't believe I'm turning 18.

Photography by Yours Truly

My life's symphony is getting longer.

Today was an awesome day! It's such a sentimental day and wonderful day both with my friends and secondary school friends! Let me just tell you how awesome is my awesome day :D

My day is awesome because... I have finally finished my Biochem report and submit it! I won't be so stressed up by it anymore haha! Whew. And my day is awesome cause we finished our Biochem presentation! I swear it was one of the most intense presentation. Just look at G Poi face... "gives deadly stare"

And then after school headed to IMM to meet Brenda. Was supposed to go out with my fellow DBS 1A/02 but I was asked to be the official photographer (with Sandra and Yvonne!) for TSMB POP! SO well gotta give it a miss. It's okay! Hope you guys had fun. From IMM fetched Sandra and cabbed down to Tanglin.

Going back to Tanglin, just expresses one word. Sentimental. As I stepped in, all my memories of that great school just rushed in. Man, I really missed those days. Anyways the band concert was alright. Need more practice and watch the conductor more!

And anyway congratulations to all the new band ex-cos! Remember, work as A BAND. You are not individuals, you guys are still a band. To those who didn't get what they want, cheer up. Band is not about position. It's all about playing and working together.

After the whole POP, went to eat dinner with Jia Hui, Cheryl, Brenda, Sandra, Suyi, Syafiqah, LTY and Keegan! Had a great time with them. Ate a lot... Oh dear. And after that cabbed home with Keegan and Sandra. Had a nice chat with them along the way.

Well... I really miss Tanglin and how it used to be. Those days... Were just indescribable. Now we are all in our own ways, and I know deep in their hearts, they miss Tanglin too. Well time has to move on, can't just stay in one spot and don't move right?

Okay see ya then. Can't wait for tomorrow! Not only I'm going to turn 18, I'm going out with Jes Neal Ade and maybe MF too! See ya then :D

Time is a flowing river. You can't touch the same water twice.

Detached

Where's my escape ladder I wonder?

Photography by Yours Truly

My escape from reality that is.

Alrighty.. What a day was today haha. Ordinary Wednesday but really tired now. I still have Biochem to do too... Oh dear should have not landed my ass on my computer chair. Cause this is what happened.

Anyway today was alright I think. Finally got our A&P result back. Really happy with the result :) Wanted to stay in school to do my report but I was so tired that I decided to go home first and... I took a nap. I was really really tired just now, so I fell asleep from 3.30 to about 5. Good sleep.

Band was fine too. Practised for IBM of course. Really looking forward to the performance as this will be my first ever band concert! Woohoo, love it. And we'll be playing some nice songs too! We were playing New World Symphony last movement, which is one of my favourite song!

After band went home with Chris as usual. Haha yeah, as usual. Talked with her about something. I'm so thankful I'm not the only one. Hahaha! Anyway I don't know why I always feel detached after band. Sad, lonely and tired. Well thankfully there's Chris and Alvin.

I don't know is it my fault for not trying hard. Or what I think is really true.

All I know is that I'm really glad cause I am fine with myself being lonely at times. I am a loner. I don't mind being alone. But of course, it sucks. Anyway, there's that anti-social device that Joel said. My iPod! And of course to be exact, my music.

Okay I have to go and finish my work. What a tiring day. Ironic how I feel so tired yet I always stayed up late :/ Okay see ya!

Loneliness is me.

Werid food is good food

Solitary.
Photography by Yours Truly
Taken by my new 18-200mm Tamron lens! :D

Right, let me make a quick bloggy before I head off to continue with my studying!

Anyway I just had this weird bt nice supper I made. Strawberries with ham (rolled)! I know it sounds really weird but trust me, the taste is amazing. I feel that the sweetness and a little of its tartness compliment the ham really well. Lovely. Should try this more often.

And yesterday, I cooked this veal steak marinated with cherry! Eew? It's yum! Okay honestly I couldn't taste the cherry at all, so I decided to make this reduction of the marinade which is the juice of the cherry. Cook it with garlic and salt pepper. Not bad.

Haha alright enough of food.

Today was alright. Went to run again with Vic, Jesher and Nigel. Ran the same 5.5 km but this time round, we ran the 4 km non stop, round after round. Took 34 minutes. I wanna improve my timing :)

I headed home first cause I wanna prepare my CRS test so I walked back while the rest headed to get some drinks. I was walking the entire 1.5 km back. I feel it was great. It gave me the time to destress and relax, and to think about so many stuff. Should do this walking more often.

Got my new Tamron 18-200mm lens too! Well I was so happy to get it... BUT! I think something went inside my sensor in my camera! There's this black thing in my pictures and it's so irritating. I'm going to send it for repair :/ really can't believe this happens.

Anyway that's all for today I suppose. Going back to finish up my CRS stuff. Test tomorrow! All the best to me and the rest of DBS 1A02! See ya :D

Impossibility, is just a state of the mind - Taken from RD. I forgot who

Joy of running

Friends are like flowers

Photography by Yours Truly

Sometimes they bloom, sometimes they close.

Righty, believe it or not, one hour ago I just reached my house! Well not from school or anything but I went to run with Jesher, Victor and Nigel! Yup Nigel is our new addition haha. He joined us and took the time from his house somewhere in Alexandria road to come to Dover and run. Woohoo.

Anyway we ran at the usual track. But this time we ran at night. We met at the track on 7.30 PM. I ran another extra 1,5 km to meet them so in total, I ran a distance of 5.5 km! And thanks to Victor for being in canoeing, he is like some hardcore push-uppers now hahaha! Thanks for the push though, couldn't have done it without you.

And after the run we went to get something to drink and chatted for a while. While chatting, I've realised how MUCH they have all grown up now. We were those tiny kids running around a classroom and now... We're buffed (well not for me) guys with so much mature thinking.

I guess time really flies quickly.

As Victor headed home, the rest of us headed to Holland to grab something to eat since I have not eaten my dinner. That's all for the running trip hehe. Starting to enjoy running especially with friends. I love the fact they encourage me a lot. And I love the fact I run not to be the fastest. But someone who completes the run.

School was fine. I've realised today, one of the worst thing that could happen to a CLS student is to leave his labcoat behind! Like what happened today. To ME. Oh well thankfully I was able to retrieve it back. And something funny happened during AP practical!

I was singing in some soprano voice (well my friends I guess are used to it) and suddenly I heard a voice.

Ms Joanne: Wah is that some soprano voice?

Me: Yeah (Continues singing)

.........

Me: OMG is that Ms Joanne?!

Everyone laughed hard and I was like laughing like mad. I didn't know it was Ms Joanne! Oh man, I felt so embarrassed. But I love this company that my class gave. DBS 1A02 is such a bubbly class. I am really glad that I am in this class. I think it's one of the most bonded class I've been in (maybe due to the fact that there are only 22 people).

Alrighty that's all for this tiring day. Gonna head to bed soon and... I'm getting my 18-200mm lens tomorrow! Woohoo. Alright see ya and good night!

Good friends are friends that understand their friends and give them some space.

PS: No offence but why are you acting like this?

Commencement!

Congratulations sista!
Photography by my sis' friend
I wanna be like her too! In 6 years time or so :/

Today... Or yesterday actually since it past midnight, or to be exact, just now, I just went to my sister's commencement! Wow it was such a grandeur and inspirational event. Even though I was not the one being conferred, but it feels so great. I could feel the vibe and the aura of happiness (and sadness) there. Reminds me of grad night seriously.

Anyway yeah my sister has officially graduated from NUS! Congratulations to her, I'm so proud of you sister hoho. So we went to UCC to go for the comencement and wow it was really crowded there. Felt really out of place to see those graduants. Since I'm just a poly student! Haha. But motivated me a lot. Like if they can do it, why can't I?

And talking about motivation I was motivated too cause I saw this three guys in a video and they are all from poly! So it really gave me the push to push on and perhaps get my place in NUS haha. But uh I wanted to actually go to another country, if possible.

Anyway the future is unknown. Isn't it?

The ceremony itself was nice. Very formal unlike our grad night. There's some pro-chancellor guy and he looked really important. And it was really nice. Some valedictorians came back to say a speech. It was nice too.

Lots of pictures taken! May be posting it on Facebook.

Okay that's all for the day. My two sisters and one cousin will be going back tomorrow. So I'll be alone here for a month. Rejoice? Not sure yet haha. Anyway see ya!

Attending such events just touched me really :)

Squeak!

The lone musician
Photography by Yours Truly

Well...

What a tiring day today. And sort of disappointing in some ways too. But out of this disappointment, come happiness. What am I talking about? Well yeah shall elaborate more haha.

Rushed to school today for CRS preparation. And after all the hussle and bustle we had during the preparation, we did not present at all today. Only a group present, and that's not ours. Well... But on the bright side at least we finished it. So we don't have to drag along eh?

And the good news is... Biochem report's dateline has been pushed to next week! Woohoo Dr Poi rocks! Thank you so much. Now I wouldn't have to rush right? Haha awesome, more time to be spent for CRS essay too. It'll be a rush yeah...

Today's French class was odd. Cause very little people went. Like 12? The class seemed very quiet... But it was fun, we learnt colours and everyday wear. Our vocab has expanded. Woohoo. Je porte un T-shirt gris et pantalon noir. Hehe

And as for band it wasn't bad either but... I squeaked a lot! I don't know why. I hated it. I tried playin softer (to prevent squeaking) but there were only 3 of us. So I couldn't afford to play soft. But anyway thankfully it stopped after about an hour or so. Sigh... Need to practise!

That's all for today. It's time for me to try to do the rest of the work I need to finish. Wonder if I can finish Biochem report AND CRS tonight...

I'm a lone musician who whistled through the street

Walking aimlessly to nowhere, on his barefeet.

I whistled songs of mysterious and sad melody

To reflect my loneliness and despairity.

Back to reality

Sometimes I wonder when...
Photography by Yours Truly
When that day will arrive. The day that I'll be free
Of worries, stress or to put in all. Life

Right, so I've not been blogging for quite some time eh? Well the reason to that is because I spent the past three days with my cousins! Yup I stayed at the hotel, and totally spent all my weekend with them. Had an awesome weekend with them though :D

Well most of the days were spent shopping with them. So it was rather tiring sometimes, cause we did A LOT of walkings. Nevermind, good for health haha! Except for Saturday, we went to Snow City and Science centre. Not bad, been a long time since I've been there (and a first time for snow city!) And went to the omnitheatre as well.

And in the afternoon accompanied them shopping so I did buy some clothes. And also bought some other things. Same for today, except went with one of my cousin, Febi, to Funan and Simlim, then met the rest for lunch and then yeah the shopping thing goes on. Really tired now.

While they all will be going for Universal Studio tomorrow... I'll be stuck in school! Oh how great... This is horrible. I wanna join them too! But I simply can't, thanks to school. Bleah. And yeah I want my Youth day holiday as well! Oh man, nevermind I think, can't do anything either right.

Sigh and I always feel sad when my cousins are going back (since I won't be able to send them off on Tuesday) cause it tells me that... I have to go back to reality. Well well it sucks but too bad I guess. Gotta live with it. Reality is like everything. It's life.

Anyway my sis is here for her graduation on Wednesday and yeah. I'll be going for her graduation too! Woohoo. And be the day's official photographer hehe. Alright that's all for today and my awesome weekend. I gotta do my work now. CRS presentation tomorrow as well. Bye bye :)

Freedom is like a drug. Once you get addicted, you may lose your life too. (In a sense of direction that is)