Outweighs

I took this photo of St Andrew's Cathedral back in my trip to Singapore last month from the hotel room. City Hall will always be a sentimental place for me. After all, I spent 5 months learning English before I entered primary school at a language centre in Adelphi centre. It's called NYU Language centre.

My class starts at 9:30 AM every day. I would leave the house by 8 AM and I have to catch the train (with my housemate back then, Vesti) from Clementi by 8:45-9 AM ish. I remember how we would rush to go to the train station if we're late. Or how sometimes I have to go to the toilet to do some unfinished business before reaching class hahaha. Crazy to think it's been 17 years since all these!

And so I have to walk along that long walkway from the MRT to Adelphi centre, walking along the Cathedral. Sometimes I would meet some of my classmates and we would walk together. I kinda miss those days. Life was so much simpler. We would go for lunch at 11 till 12 at Funan foodcourt. My favourite was the chicken rice (as always) or the Korean food. Sometimes my friends would treat each other drinks as we help one another to buy them from the drinks stall.

But you know what I miss the most from those days?

I miss the days where certainty seemed to outweigh holding on to a hope. 

Somehow in those days, I didn't worry much. I lived my life as if things "will go according to plan". I would learn English, go for my entrance test at a primary school, attend primary school, take my PSLE, move to secondary school and so on. It was as if life felt so certain. I mean of course, anything could happen you know. But somehow I seemed to live my life as if whatever I imagined and believes will definitely happen. And now... Everything seems to be the opposite.

Perhaps I've truly learned that the only certainty in life is uncertainty itself. And there's no way I can be sure that everything is certain. Now I hold on to hope more. Because I know that nothing is certain for sure! Sometimes I feel sad thinking about this. But hey, it's life. There's no denying this.