Blogtober Done

It's the last day of October which means... I'm done with Blogtober! Hooray. As if anyone reads this blog hahaha. But yes I'm glad I stick to my plan and finished this "challenge". It was rather hard at first, especially in the first week of October. Had quite a lot of things to do and I had to like blog 2-3 days in one shot (sorry). But I think I got the better hang of it as time went by whoop.

Although... I'm still sticking to my view that I don't like blogging every day haha. But hey Blogtober isn't so bad, I just blog whatever I feel like blogging. And yeah I don't have to do a "proper" blogpost. More of this later on, I have something to talk about... Regarding the future of the blog.

Anyway it's been an enjoyable Blogtober thus far. I might continue till the end of the year, where I'll hit my target of blogging 100 posts for the year. I hope you had an Outstanding October. Here's to a Nourishing November for all of us. Gosh, two more months to 2020. Thanks for sticking with me!

Better Now

It's the 2nd last day of October already! Wow, I think this month flew by pretty quickly somehow. As always, I believe that once we passed September, the year will just breeze by till December heh. And soon enough January will be ahead of us. And the cycle will go on. Life of humans really heh.

Anyway let me share with you lots of great music of October! Lots of great albums are released in this month, and a few songs too! Also there are news of artists coming back which make me excited!

Great Music of October:

- Onwards to Zion by Vancouver Sleep Clinic (album)

- Pony by Rex Orange County (album)

- Dream Girl by Anna of The North (album)

- Cry by Cigarettes After Sex (album)

- Hamba Jaring Cahaya, Hamba Bela Gelapnya by Tashoora (album)

- Better Now by Oh Wonder

- Orphans by Coldplay

- Youth by Asgeir

- Hates Me by Otherliine

- My Love Was Like The Rain by Lapsley

Song of The Month: Fever by VSC

Okay I won't go into details of each albums/songs, but yes I love these releases of the month! I am also very excited to see the comeback of Lapsley, Coldplay and Asgeir. Asgeir really caught me by surprise heh, I thought he'll be releasing new materials next year. Looks like we're in for an earlier surprise! I'm very excited for Lapsley's EP, Coldplay's new album next month and Asgeir's in Feb.

There's really a lot of new albums and I've been taking my time listening to them fully. I especially love Rex's new album Pony. I was giving it a few plays and it's a wonderful album. Definitely one of my top 10 albums of 2019! Talking about albums... I need to compile the albums of 2019 list soon heh.

Alright. Closing off this blogtober series tomorrow. See ya again.

Slow Down

Perhaps this world has enough people that keep it spinning

And it needs more people that slow it down.

Cirafilm 200, Singapore.

No Water

I'm currently blogging at 5 AM now... It's just ridiculous and annoying how we have no water till Tuesday 3 AM just now on Monday! And the incoming water was so little that we couldn't fill our tanks urgh. I'm not exactly sure what's happening but yeah. The dry season is no joke man.

Today was incredibly hot. It was 32 degrees and the wind blowing was warm. There was not pleasant breeze at all. It's crazy to think that we're already approaching November yet the weather is still as hot as this. And that it is still very dry. In fact I think 2019 is the weirdest year in terms of weather. 

I feel like we have an inconsistent rainy and dry season. It was raining till June-ish. Cause I still remember that it was still raining during the Hari Raya Holiday so that's about June right. July was starting to get dry but we receive rain here and there. August-September the dry season was really intense! And in October we have a couple of rainy days, followed by a week of dry, hot weather again.

Not exactly sure what is going on. But yeah. Global warming is real guys.

Śūnyatā

Hello hello, it's Sunday and I am done with work, thankfully. So time for a long blog post! I've been keeping this a secret and I think it's a good time to talk about this, as it's been one month...

sunyata // emptiness

since I got my 2nd tattoo mwahaha.

Alright so yes I got myself a new tattoo on the right wrist this time. I got it tattooed by Ash again when I was in Singapore last month. I've been waiting for it to heal, not sure why it took longer this time. My skin was just peeling and peeling heh. I think it has something to do with it being tattooed on my dominant hand. Maybe there's more movement etc. So the healing is slowed down.

Anyway yes I got myself "Śūnyatā" tattooed on my right wrist. I know I want to get something that compliments the "anicca" on my left. The best tattoo to get will be "anatta" which is non-self. But I think it's too "brutal" heh. Also I haven't fully grasped the principle of anatta. This is one of the reasons why (thankfully) that I didn't get both tattooed together back in 2017 heh.

I wanted to get another tattoo since 2018 but whenever I'm back in SG, I'm always preoccupied with things. So when I got back last month, my schedule wasn't packed and thus I decided to get it. I think the idea came to me in mid 2018 ish? Since sunyata is kind of the cousin of anatta, and sunyata has a more poetic touch to "non-self". Because in Budhdism, everything is marked with emptiness!

The concept of emptiness in Buddhism is one of the most mind-blowing teaching that I have ever received. I came across the teaching of emptiness through the Prajnaparamita Sutra about 6 years ago? I was brought up in the Theravada tradition. Even when I was in Singapore, I went to a Theravada temple. It was only until I returned home and went to the temple in my hometown on new and full moon days that I started chanting the (Chinese version of) Prajnaparamita Sutra.

The first line that really got the whole ball rolling is:

"舍利子, 是诸法空相, 不生不灭, 不垢不净, 不增不减"

Which means "Sariputra, all the Dharma is empty. It is not created not destroyed, not purified nor defiled, not increasing nor decreasing.". Okay there are a lot of different translations to the sutra but it's something along this line heh. I was intrigued when I see the words "Dharma is empty". Because Dharma means the teachings of the Buddha. So how can it be empty? What does this mean?

I decided to read further and read different texts explaining this sutra. Then I remember that "Dharma" in different Dharmic religions can mean a couple of different things. From the cosmic law, to law of nature, to truth and reality (or nature of reality). Now when you replace "Dharma" with truth, that whole line makes a lot of sense for me. That the truth (whatever truth) is not created not destroyed, not purified nor defiled, not increasing nor decreasing. It is our ego that does those!

I think I love the explanation of the Sutra by Thich Nhat Hanh the most. He says that the nature of reality is marked with emptiness. Which makes a lot of clarification for me haha.

As I read further I realised how beautiful emptiness is. How emptiness isn't something negative at all. To me I take it that emptiness here is of those qualities. That's the truth. But our ego hates the truth, we want things to go on our own way and therefore we increase/decrease, purify/defile or create/destroy the truth that go according to our own way. Just so that our ego is happy.

And you know what happened when we let our ego happy? We suffer.

And I love Thay's explanation of "nature of reality". From this I can infer that everything in life is marked by emptiness. Or they are truly empty. And it's how we respond/treat these things that define our own happiness and way of life. Do we want to fill it with ignorance that feeds our ego? Or do you want to accept it and let our mindfulness fully grasp it and then respond to it?

And the Sutra goes with this line

"In emptiness there is no ignorance, no aging and death. No origination, cessation, no attainment"

This line is a bit tricky because a lot of people think Buddhists are emo people who don't want to attain anything in life hahaha. Cause someone once personally asked me so what's there to attain if there is nothing to attain? I think this whole line is a reference of impermanence (anicca) because a lot of people hate impermanence. We love things with origination but hate the fact that there's cessation. So if there is no cessation or origination to begin with, there will be no suffering.

Okay it's really hard to explain this but basically it's in line with nirvana, which is the breaking of the life and death cycle. Nirvana to me isn't just about "life" and "death" but everything that is created and destroyed. Like our thoughts, emotions, feelings and so on. To be aware of the creation and cessation of these things. That's the end goal of Buddhism and it's hard to attain heh.

Cause we still have our own ego. Who create and cease things as and when they want it heh.

So yes. This is why sunyata is truly a complimentary tattoo to my anicca on my left. They're like the cookies and cream of Buddhism! The salt and pepper, the chocolate and mint. And so on. I think they are facts of life. It's hard to deny them... Once again, cause of our own egos.

Alright I hope you enjoy these insights! Thank you to Ash once again for getting this inked on my wrist. I think enough of word tattoos. Lets do... Something artistic. Heh heh.

Have a great last week of October everyone :)

It Gets Better

As mentioned last night, I just spent the whole of Saturday night listening to the new released albums! Well even though I was doing work but at least I manged to listen to all albums mwahaha. And they are all great albums! I particularly love Rex new album "Pony"... I just want to give him a hug. I really hope he's okay because he sounds like he's struggling in the songs :(

Anna of The North's new album is also amazing. I feel like she "grows" from her first album. There's a mix of different style of songs in "Dream Girl" and it's really cool. I discovered her quite recently on earlier last year I think, thanks to Spotify again. And she's a new favourite from me. 

I hope I can see her live one day :)

Okay real short post today because I just want to chill! See you tomorrow.

Homework

Ever since I use Spotify, Fridays have become more "special" for me because I get to listen to a lot of new songs! As you all know most new albums are released on Fridays. And thanks to Spotify features like "New Music Friday" and "Release Radar" playlist, I get to listen to the newly released albums on the weekend. Which is also a good way to keep track of what's being released and so on. I realised I listen to so many bands/artists that sometimes I couldn't keep track of release dates heh.

This Friday is rather special cause we have 3 albums release that I'm excited for!

1. Pony by Rex Orange County
2. Cry by Cigarettes After Sex
3. Dream Girl by Anna of The North

So yep according to the title... I have a "homework" to do this weekend! Haha.

We also have new songs from Coldplay and Oh Wonder. Along with the songs from the Spotify Playlist. Alright gonna spend the weekend listening to these new albums then. You have a good weekend! :)

Welcome Back!

Coldplay is back y'all! After lots of teasers and posters and many more, they're back with 2 new songs titled Orphans and Arabesque. I was listening to their premiere on BBC Radio 1 and wow it was amazing! Okay I know it's past midnight by the time they aired but let me just pretend I live in London and I'm listening to it on Thursday still hahaha. Well, just glad they're back! It's been 4 years since their last album, and 2 since their Kaleidoscope EP. 

I think Orphans is a wonderful song with MX/AHFOD vibes to it. It's such an uplifting song but hmm the lyrics are truly heartbreaking man. It's about bombs in Syria and it's just really sad when you read through the lyrics. But I hope it is able to shine light into people's heart and let the tree of compassion sprout out of them, or let them grow taller and taller.

Arabesque is just wow! It's just some fresh and new sounds from them and I'm digging it. Stromae and Femi Kuti is inside too which is really cool as well. I can't imagine how it'll sound live.

Provided I get the chance to see them again...

Anyway their new album "Everyday Life" is coming next month on the 22nd and I can't wait to listen to the rest of the songs. Listening to Chris' interview with Annie Mac just now, the album revolves a lot about the events happening around the world. How Chris said it: "every day is great and every day is terrible. There is so much life bursting out on the planet". Sounds beautiful to me.

I find it really cool and funny how every time Coldplay releases new materials, I will always get excited! It's kind of like me going back to 7-11 years ago when they released Viva La Vida and Mylo Xyloto. Back when I was still a student in Singapore. How exciting it is to listen to new music from them, and then buying the albums at HMV haha. Whew, they've been with me for almost 15 years now!

Alright that's all for this short post welcoming Coldplay back haha. Can't wait for Everyday Life! :)

Welcome back gentlemen!

The Hunter

I'd love to believe that we're not alone here

I saw the news of the Orionids meteor shower last night and decided to try my luck to capture it on my camera. But I think the moon was too bright so I didn't manage to capture it on my camera. But I did shoot the beautiful Orion constellation. So yes, I managed to capture the hunter #punintended

The hunter

That's the photo of the constellation! I think it's so beautiful. Orion is the first constellation that I "taught" myself to see, back then when I was participating in the Young Scientist challenge thingy in primary school haha. I took part the astronomy challenge and borrowed lots of books from the library about space and astronomy. That's when I read about Orion and how to see it in the sky.

Here in my hometown we're pretty blessed to have starry skies when it's clear at night. So I back then I taught myself to spot Orion. Thanks to his belt which is pretty easy to spot in the sky. Although sadly I do realise that as the years go by, the sky gets less and less clearer. Perhaps due to the fact that we have an increased light pollution. I mean back then we didn't have as much lighted signboards as now heh. And of course as a country progresses, the night lights increases too right.

Anyway I've always been fascinated with space. Because I'd love to believe that... We are not alone in this universe. And how spacious and big, and unexplored the space is makes me believe that we're definitely not alone! Haha. And the thought that we may be alone saddens me heh.

Just like what Arthur Clarke says:

"There are two possibilities. Either we are alone in this universe, or we are not. 

Both are equally terrifying"

But I think being not alone in this universe is not terrifying tho! :P

Arctic Inside Me

What a delightful surprise to have Lapsley releasing a new song with a video after 3 years! Welcome back Holly. I think this is a beautiful song with beautiful words. And the video accompanying it is just incredible. I am so excited for her new EP coming next month. The lyrics of this song is truly a beautiful poem. I really love the lines. Especially the one that says

"Remember when you said my love was like the rain

not the sweet sound after the drought.

But the pain of it hard on your back in a storm"

"Remember when you said my love was like the sea

not the big pool in a tropical

You said I had the arctic inside of me"

So beautiful. Can't wait for more.

Dreams Do Come True

I love using the "on this day" feature on Facebook to see what/how I was doing in the past years. After all I've been on FB for 10 years now. Although as I realise, as the years go by, I become less and less active haha. Life happens, that's why. Anyway I was looking on that feature for today...

and look what I found:

Hahaha, guess what, I did go to Tibet 5 years later! I just find it cool that I wrote this and... Well I did go to Tibet haha. Not sure why I was talking about the language. I think I must have found a Tibetan song/chant, or I was watching a documentary on Tibet and heard some people speak there I guess. But yes Tibetan is quite a beautiful language in my opinion. It sounds a bit like Mongolian.

I think the universe works in mysterious ways. And it will conspire with you to give what you want, in the right timing and in the right place. I did write a lot about wanting to go to different places in the future before I die tho haha. I hope the future me will tell the current me that I will go to these places hahaha. I'd say I love my hobbies - blogging, journaling and so on. It gives me a platform to look back and see if I whatever I wrote do come true or not. And of course to see what I was doing in the past.

And truth be told, some of the things I wrote on my journal did come true haha. Like how I envision myself listening to vinyl on weekends as a way to chill. That's what I'm doing now! Heh. Perhaps it's true that we make the world with our thoughts. And what we believe, what we give out to the universe, will one day return to us. Like an echo traversing through the universe, only finding their way back to us in the end. So, send some good vibes now and they'll return!

Alright that's all for now, hope you have a fabulous week ahead :)

Earlier Sun

It's currently October and we have passed the spring equinox here, for us Southern Hemisphere folks. Which means the sun is rising earlier and earlier! Till solstice comes. I kinda realise now, that the sky would start lighting up by 5:15 AM ish. Usually it would light up in 6 AM. Unless the sky is cloudy of course. So nowadays I try to hit the bed earlier, and switch off my lights etc earlier too heh.

I have a love hate relationship with the earth's positions throughout the year. Equinoxes, Solstices and so on. Because of my weird sleeping pattern I guess. When we pass the winter solstice in June, I would start getting "anxious" because the sun would rise earlier haha. And when we pass the summer solstice, I'll be heaving a sigh of relief haha. But yes, it's a pretty cool occurrence though.

Our planet is amazing. Our solar system is amazing. The universe too.

Another short post today!

Hearing Rain

We could hear the rain coming here heh

Today I encountered something rather extraordinary. And quirky and cool. I was actually... "Hearing" an incoming rain! It's so cool haha. Okay so I did see that grey clouds were gathering. And in fact it had already started raining in the distance. I could see rain pouring down from quite far. But from where I was located, there was no rain yet. And then we continued walking, and we could hear rain drops falling hard on a nearby building zinc roofs. But yet, no rain on us yet, we're completely dry haha.

As we continued walking down, making our way back, the sound got louder and louder but there was still no rain on us yet heh. But yes eventually, the rain did come to our side. And it rained hard.

So yeah it was a rather cool and quirky experience. I've seen incoming rain before, but I've never "heard" incoming rain. Anyway, I'm glad that we're kind of entering the rainy season. It's been quite a brutal 3 months of dry season. Now that the rain is here, farmers can start planting again! And that people don't have to worry that their water shortage will go on heh. Climate change is real guys.

Alright just a short post today. I wanna chill on this Saturday night. See ya.

No Time?

As much as I have a love-hate relationship with time, I cannot imagine life without time existing.

There are days where I wish time would fly faster, and there are days where I wish it could slow down. But I can never imagine a life where it simply doesn't exist! Haha. Well time itself is a mystery isn't it. I don't really understand the concept of time in physics form. It is very very complex.

I think there were a few occurrences where I was "forced" to not know the time. I think it was during CLS FO Camp in 2011 where I came back as a photographer. It was night walk time and I had to walk along the stations to take some photos (and I was also a game master). My phone battery died so and I have no clock with me (except for my camera, but that's kinda troublesome isn't it). So I spent the night walking along the stations, and then I realised that the sky turned bright and boom. It was like 6:30 AM. I did ask some other GMs for time just to check. But most of the time, I wasn't.

And then the next one was during my flight from LA to Taiwan when I went to the Us in 2012. It was like a 12 hour flight or something and yeah because I was heavily jetlagged, I didn't bother checking the time heh. Except for the "time to destination" part where I checked how long more hah.

There were many times when I would do stuff and without realising the time, n-hour has passed. Then I would panic and like wow where did time go! But there were also times where I realised how slow time seems to fly and I'm like dear time can you pass faster please haha. Humans...

Anyway the reason why I can't imagine life without time is that... Time gives us a sense of completion. It reminds us that we are finite, and that everything is impermanent. With this knowledge we are able to do things well and to complete things and so on. Just like deadlines, they push us to achieve things. So if you imagine if there's no time, how can we actually accomplish these things? 

If there's no time we might take forever to do things. And at the same time we might also rush things and not do them properly. Or realised that we could have done things in a better way.

Also this reminds me of a quote from "The Timekeeper" by Mitch Albom:

"Man alone chimes the hour. And because of this, man alone suffers a paralysing fear that no other creature endures. A fear of time running out."

I think the key here is not to fear that time is running out, but to be aware that time WILL run out. So you better do your shit mindfully and properly hahaha. But yeah. I've always find it intriguing that we "create" time by inventing clocks, calendars and measuring units and so on. But we are unable to live life to the fullest by fearing that we are running out of time. 

Lets not put the blame on time but ourselves though.

Okay that's all for today's post. This is a random thought that crossed my mind a few days ago heh.

Traversing

Traversing the same spaces 

 With my body experiences almost the same things

Just in a different self

And a different time

Photos taken on Cirafilm 800, with Skina camera

Hyped

My social media feed has been buzzing with the rumours and "investigations" on the return of Coldplay which looks like it's coming soon! Okay shoutout to Coldplaying and ColdplayXtra for your "investigative" work haha. They are keeping us updated and excited of course!

So apparently there's a poster of Coldplay and Friedric Nietzche in a subway station in Brazil. It looks like a vintage photo of the band. And apparently this poster was taken off after that heh. Some fans have snapped the photo of the poster and it got Twitter buzzing! Also recently (last week I think?) there's a news from a "reliable" source that Coldplay is releasing a new album next month and another one next year. Just like what they did in Ghost Story and AHFOD.

Well I've been a fan of Coldplay and the way they announce albums have been very interesting and fun. Like when they released Midnight from GH by just simply writing a status that goes Ulaanbatar 12 AM or something like that, referring to the time of Midnight's video release on YouTube 5 years ago!

I'm pretty excited for new Coldplay music cause ever since I watched them live 2 years back, I've been speculating and wondering when they will release some new music again. Well looks like it's coming real soon now. On the other hand, let's enjoy one of my favourite songs from them.

Paraaa Paraa Paraadise

PS: They changed the video thumbnail to a black and white one! Mmhmm

Hospital

Continuing from my previous post.

So as mentioned, I spent the night at the hospital with Pa Bambang and his wife. He was placed at the observation room, which is near the emergency unit. So as we were waiting, we see people coming in. Some looking for medical treatment and some were in an emergency. There was also a pregnant lady whom I think is going into labour, cause her face seemed to be in pain from contractions.

Along the night I witnessed these people. A pregnant lady seemingly in pain from her contractions. A few young men who looked like they're having stomach discomfort (they were holding on to their stomachs). An old lady who looked like she was having difficulty breathing as well. 

In the morning on my way to the blood bank to settle the transfusion issues, I passed by the baby room and heard the sounds of crying newborns. The morning air was cold and crisp. The sun was shining and somehow it was a pretty surreal and serendipitous moment to be in.

As I was accompanying Pa Bambang who's in quite a critical condition, I'm seeing and hearing all these sounds and sights - of life. A lady about to give birth. Sounds of babies crying. Young men who fell sick. An old lady who looks frail. And of course Pa Bambang himself fighting for his life.

In that night I was just feeling helpless, yet hopeful. I still held on to the hope that he's going to be okay once he went for haemodialysis. I'm still hopeful that the drugs administered are able to bring him to a stable condition. But I was also helpless looking at him struggling to breathe. A conscious, human being, gasping for air. And yet there is nothing we could do at that point. It was tough.

That morning felt surreal to me. It was as if I was hearing and looking at the sounds and sights of life. A lifetime, summarised in these senses I was experiencing. It was weird. But beautiful.

Death and All His Friends

Today was a sad day. Someone I know for a long time, and a prominent figure in the temple has passed away. And everything unfolded rather quickly so yeah, it was quite a sad news to wake up to.

Actually I spent the whole of Sunday night at the hospital accompanying him and his wife. It was a really sudden news because earlier on Sunday afternoon, my dad actually called him and asked him to meet him on Monday to talk about treatment plans. And at 11 PM, his wife contacted my sister telling her that they're both at the hospital. So I decided to meet them at the hospital.

Long story short, he's suffering from renal failure. And seeing his blood test results I am in deep shock. How can he still lead his everyday life with such results is beyond my understanding on the human body. Cause his wife told me that in the past week he was still going on about his normal routine. With such states he would have been unconscious in my opinion... 

We were just waiting for his blood pressure, SpO2 level and blood acidity level to return to acceptable levels after medications were given to him, so that he can safely go for haemodialysis. At 3 AM his blood pressure went to safe levels so we were just waiting to see if it will stay stable. But at 4 AM his blood pressure rises again, and his SpO2 level decreased again.

Waited again till 7 AM and his blood pressure went back to safe level again. We were also waiting for his blood to be checked by the blood bank for transfusion as his Hb level was low. And also waiting from the haemodialysis department for the green light. His wife's sister came and I decided to go back home since there's someone else accompanying her then.

At 8:30 his wife messaged me saying that he's going for haemodialysis soon so I was quite relieved and went to sleep. And when I woke up later in the afternoon.... I received the bad news. It turned out that his blood pressure went up again and thus he couldn't go for haemodialysis.

Tinge of guilt hit me, wishing I was there to accompany him and his wife. And to be honest it was really tough to see him suffer. Because of his renal failure, he was having lung oedema (where the lungs is filled with water, because the kidneys couldn't get rid of it). So he was suffocating and having difficulty breathing. I swear seeing him telling me that it's difficult for him to breathe was really tough. Because I know he was conscious. It was really tough. I wish I no one would experience it.

When my late aunt and grandma passed away, they were unconscious. So even though it looks like they were "struggling", their brain has "switched off" and they didn't really know what was happening to them. But this time round it was different. He was awake, he was aware.

He is a prominent figure in the temple, and probably the Buddhist community of my hometown. So I think we have lost quite a figure. And my family and I have known him since I was young. He used to fetch my sister, cousins and I for Sunday school and send us home). And he used to coordinate with me when the temple needs flowers for events or prayers, of if there's anything else we can help.

We'll miss him for sure.

Selamat Jalan Pa Bambang. Thank you for everything that you have done for the Buddhist community of Sukabumi. I will never forget them. Sorry that I couldn't do much last night. Rest easy and may you cross the other shore. Condolences to his family. Take care everyone.

Sabbe Sankhara Anicca

Sunday

There's something about Sundays. That feel, that moment, that vibe where you know that another week is starting. There is a sense of excitement of what's to come, but there's also sense of apprehension because you don't know what's to come. But well, we always keep going. It's like life isn't it. We go to bed every night not knowing what will come for us tomorrow.

Happy Sunday everyone.

You Deserve This

"You're listening to, Oncle Jazz"

Currently spinning Men I Trust new album Oncle Jazz on the vinyl player on this chill Saturday night. So glad that the vinyl arrived today! Just in time for me to chill tonight. Well it's been a habit (or hobby?) of mine to just play some vinyl on Saturday nights and do nothing. Just lay on my bed and listen to the music. It feels pretty good. To take a proper good break before another week begins.

Well to be honest there's no such things as weekend for me heh. I always have stuff to do on weekends. So on the night of Friday and Saturday is when I chill. Listen to music, watch YouTube videos and stuff. On Saturday I usually listen to some vinyl and do some journalling too. Usually I would journal while listening to the vinyl playing but these days, I do it separately.

Anyway, the new Men I Trust album really suits this Saturday night feels! Especially with my favourite song from them playing throughout the room - You Deserve This. I really love this song. I feel warm and nice whenever I listen to it. There's this whole cosy vibe from the song haha. And the title says it all too - You Deserve This! I really recommend listening to this song at the end of a day or week. Don't do anything and just listen to it as you lay on your bed. It's bliss.

Alright I guess that's all for now. My Blogtober has been doing quite well I suppose. Lets keep it up! Just a short post tonight cause I wanna chill on this Saturday night :P

Galway Sky

Another random music post for today! I just recently got reunited with this beautiful song by Emiko Shiratori titled Galway Sky. So it took me 18 years to actually realise that this is a separate song by Emiko instead of a song from FFIX! Well that's because I discovered this song from a OST album for FFIX. It was just titled Galway and I thought that this is a song from the game (even though I never heard it play inside the game at all haha). It's one of my favourite songs!

Now that I know the lyrics, I fell in love with the song even more. I hope I can get Emiko's CDs!

World Mental Health Day

Today is World Mental Health Day and my social media is buzzing about it. I would say it's a great thing! It's really time for the world to drop the stigma of mental health issues. And I hope more people can come forward to share and talk about their experiences too. I know it's hard but I always believe that recognising and accepting your mental health issues is a really important first step.

Sadly I live in a country where there is still a huge stigma about mental health. It's not so easy to talk to people about this issue, especially when people here throw the whole spectrum of mental health issues into one huge umbrella. People usually go straight to just generalising one's mental health issue with "lunatic" or "genetic" or some even believe in black magic and so on. And sadly, weakness.

Personally... I haven't been clinically diagnosed with depression or anxiety. But I've had my fair share of dark thoughts accompanying me throughout my life. And somehow the past three years have been especially more challenging for me. And I can't really share what I'm going through with anyone here.

And not only me, but I realise a few of my friends are sharing the same sentiment too. Though not directly or outspokenly, I think we are all going through somewhat a similar condition.

Can't really talk much about it here heh.

But anyway, if you are struggling with anything, I really encourage you to open up and find someone you can trust and talk to, and share it with them. Or if you can please seek help from a counselour, psychologist or therapist. I understand how hard it is to even share things with your own family members. A good friend is also a good platform. Just someone who can listen to your story.

And most importantly, I hope you can keep holding on. Have faith, be brave and keep going. Nothing in this life is permanent. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. Your dark clouds will disappear as the winds of change are constantly blowing free in your life.

And as always, as Florence and The Machine song goes; it's always darkest before the dawn.

Happy World's Mental Health Day!

Rhythm

Okay I have a confession: I actually write two posts in one day HAHAHA. As in... I'm writing this post on the 10th. Like 2 posts in a day, get it? Okay well sorry for "cheating" but I was just having a lot of work last night so I couldn't blog. In fact I finished work at like 5 AM ish. It was pretty late so I decided to push my blogging schedule to today. Well it's cheating but it's not. Get it.

Anyway yes I'm always quite busy in the beginning and the ending of each month hah. So yeah, please understand that. I feel that as you grow older, you will create a rhythm in your life. A rhythm for each day, week, month and so on. So yes I'm just following my "monthly" rhythm finishing work on the beginning of the month. I guess it's just life. You will find a routine and you'll do it.

The fun thing about routine and rhythms is that... You'll find ways to make them work! And to make them work well and smoothly too. I think I have like transitioned from a schedule guy, to happy-go-lucky guy, and now I'm a make-use-of-your-time-well kind of guy. I think as you grow older, you will realise how precious time is. And you'll do your best to make full use of each day.

And from here you will realise that even the slightest change to your routine can give a huge impact in your day/week/month. Things like doing work part by part every day so that you won't have a huge one at the end of the deadline, or even arranging your schedule and time well so that your day will run smoothly. I think this is part of growing up, how we manage our time and eventually our life.

Perhaps me doing 2 posts in one day is part of the trick too! :P

Monument

I came across this quote by Cato from the dailystoic page on Instagram:

"After I'm dead, I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one"

I thought it's a great quote! And yes I'd rather have no monument too haha. In fact when I die I don't even want a tomb. I want to be cremated and have my ashes thrown to the sea. I want to be part of the universe again! This planet becomes my tomb and I'll be "everywhere". I'll be the clouds, the seawater and perhaps the nutrients that will seep inside a tree. And so on and so forth.

Wouldn't it be tiring to still be part of the living, and the worldly world after we leave?

Exhale

Alright I'm doing a Blogging Prompt for today. The title is Exhale!

Well I'm just gonna do a post about a new "habit" that I like doing nowadays. Even though I meditate everyday, and I focus on my breaths during my meditation, these days I like to "meditate" when I'm out and about - very simply put, I bring my awareness to my breath! Haha. It's a very easy thing to do, just stop whatever you're doing, take some deep breaths and continue. I think it helps a lot.

I read once that a great meditation master is able to meditate "everywhere". When they're walking, drinking, eating, driving (!!) and even sleeping. Errr haha. But I get what they they mean by this. It simply means that they are able to bring their awareness and consciousness to whatever they are currently doing. And if we can make this a habit, our lives will change really. It's a great exercise too.

In fact as Mingyur Rinpoche said, the easiest way for us to meditate is to just be aware that we are breathing. I think I talked about this once, but... When was the last time that you're conscious that you're breathing? I asked this question to myself once and I think the only time of the day where I'm conscious of my breathing is when I meditate haha. And thus I make it a habit to do these mini meditations throughout the day. Just telling myself "okay, you're breathing, keep going".

Sometimes it's quite scary to think that there are some instances where I was actually like "not breathing". Or perhaps not breathing right. And it feels better to just remind myself to breathe properly again heh. And yeah it's a very easy habit to do! Just stop whatever you're doing and take deep breaths. If you do it lots of times throughout the day, you'll feel more focused and better I guess.

Don't forget to breathe guys. And breathe well too.

Vegan Food in SG

Right continuing on the Singapore trip last weekend, I'm gonna share with you some of the awesome vegan food that I ate while I was in Singapore! Had a wonderful weekend eating so many good vegan food in SG haha. I wish I have more time to explore and eat more vegan food in  Singapore. One day hopefully. I think I should dedicate a trip just to eat the vegan food I've been seeing on Instagram haha.

Impossible Gyoza!

Lets begin with this amazing Impossible Gyoza from Empress @ Asian Civilisation Museum! I've been wanting to eat Gyoza/Wonton/dumplings for a long long time and I'm glad I managed to eat this. This is ridiculously good. I love the flavour and the texture of the "meat" made out of the Impossible Patty. Candy ordered the Omnipork and cabbage dumpling too but I forgot to take a photo of it heh.

Heng Hua Rice Vermicelli (right)

Next we also have this rice vermicelli with Omnipork and deep fried beancurd! The rice vermicelli is okay. A bit "disappointed" with the omnipork. I was expecting it to taste kind of like pork haha but it has a very familiar mock-meat aftertaste (unlike the Impossible). But the broth of the vermicelli and the deep fried beancurd is so so rich and flavourful. Love the dish! Great for sharing.

The Matcha cake! 

Kai and Candy ordered this sticky date pudding (I hope it's vegan, I think it is HAHA) and it is the best sticky date pudding I've ever eaten! It comes with a butterscotch ice cream but I didn't have it. I ordered the matcha cake with coconut ice cream and it's very lovely too. The stick date pudding tops it all though. Really flavourful, rich, decadent and just robust. Please give it a try folks!

The Impossible Patty Melt (not vegan tho)

The next day for brunch with Jolene and Tacy at Parkbench Deli, I ordered the Impossible Patty Melt! I just realised that it's not vegan cause of the cheese. so I opted the cheese out. But then I found out they have a sauce inside which I'm pretty sure it's not vegan but oh well, I still eat it anyway haha. Will do better research next time. But the patty is really good! Love how comforting the whole melt is. Even Jolene and Tacy says it tastes like meat mwahaha. Had some kombucha to go with it too.

Look at the size of this dosa! Briyani on top

For lunch with Nivedha and Saeyeoh, we went to Anjappar which is actually an international restaurant chain with branches in different countries! I ordered the vegetable briyani and an onion dosa, which turned out to be the biggest dosa I've ever eaten in my life haha. I love the chutneys that compliment the dosa, and the briyani is pretty flavourful too! I always miss Indian food and I always try to eat them whenever I'm in Singapore. My wish is granted in this trip weeee.

Hands down the best vegan Ice cream I've ever tasted

For my last day I went to try Kind Kones which is recommended by Neal. And well, hands down the best vegan ice cream I've ever eaten!! I seriously wish I have more space in my stomach (and money HAHA) to try all the different flavours. I tried the pandan gula melaka and double chocolate and they are so so good. The chocolate one don't even taste like it's a vegan ice cream! They used coconut milk as their base but the flavour works really well! Anyway it's so good that I had another scoop of their D24 durian flavour haha. Had it on a cone to go as I was making my way back to City Hall.

Truffle Orh-Luak

Last but not least for dinner with Syaz, Reb and Yingzhi, we went to Flavours by Saute in Funan. It is a vegetarian/vegan restaurant that sells the veg version of many Singapore favourites! I ordered their truffle orh-luak (oyster omelette). It is really good! Though I feel that the truffle flavour is kinda "on and off", some pieces have them but some pieces don't. It does give me the same whole-ness feeling of eating orh-luak though so I think they did a really great job. Also we tried a vegan otah which tastes like otah but has a different texture. And the lion's mane mushroom with truffle mayo is lovely too! :)

And yup that's all for the awesome vegan food that I ate in my lovely weekend in Singapore! I look forward to eating and trying more vegan food when I'm back in SG :) Please give these a try folks!

Of Wedding and Weekend

Congratulations to the newly wed!

I went for Jes' wedding a week ago on Saturday the 28th of September! I seriously can't believe that I'm actually attending a wedding of one of my best friends whom I've known for 13 years. It feels weird... But of course I'm happy for the new couple! Just that I realised how fast time is flying!

Anyway yes I headed down to the Genting Hotel Jurong after I met Nivedha and Saeyeoh. I walked from Westgate and was just trying to find my way to the hotel. Jurong changed so much really haha. I was just following the hotel by looking at it and heading towards its direction heh. It is located behind JE library so I kinda know the place. It was rather a sentimental walk to go there really!

Met Ade again! Can't believe we're attending Jes' wedding haha

Met Adeline first as she was in the hotel's lobby with the other bridesmaids. I thought that there were things to be done but apparently everything is done! Haha. Was just hanging around the lobby with them. I thought I had to wait till the banquet to see Jes but she went to the lobby too! Joined her for the tea ceremony session near the ballroom and then we took some photos together.

Then I helped out at the front desk thingy with Ade and Klaus (is that the correct name haha). Okay lah Ade and Klaus were the one doing the greetings, my job was just to point out the guest tables and where to put the red packet hahaha. And then Brenda came and I joined her to the ballroom to chope some good seats! Mengfung came and shortly after that the banquet started :D

Table 16

Was seated with the other Tanglin folks like Carmen, Jaslyn and the rest. Man we are all adults now!! So scary haha, it felt like yesterday when were still in uniform. Anyway food after food, drinks after drinks and photos after photos, the banquet was an enjoyable one! Food looks really damn good even though I can't eat em haha. Thank you so much Jeslyn for helping me order veg food from the hotel!

Missing Neal and Weiqi!

Anyway yeah it was a great night to be reunited with the Tanglin folks again. As mentioned above, it really felt... Weird to experience all of these. It feels like yesterday when we are all still in grey pants and checkered skirt. And here we are attending Jeslyn's wedding together. It's so... Fuzzy really. That night really made me miss our secondary school days! I think life was simpler back then heh.

13 years since I know this lady, and now she's married!

To Jeslyn, I just want to congratulate you and Leon for your wedding! And I wish both of you a blessed and blissful marriage. May you both love each other more every day :D You're one of the few people who still kept in contact with me all of these years, since we went to different poly, and even since I went back for good. And I will forever be grateful for that. Thank you for all the spontaneous dinner and supper and outings that we did when I was still in SG! Please keep in touch alright.

Okay that'a all for this special night back in Singapore! I will blog about the awesome vegan food that I ate in Singapore haha. Once again congratulations to Mr and Mrs Foo! <3

September in Singapore

Hello! It's been exactly a week since I returned from my trip to Singapore. I went to Singapore to attend Jeslyn's wedding last Saturday and it was a great trip! Managed to reunite with a few people that I haven't met in a long long time. More of that coming up here. Anyway I will blog about Jes' wedding on another post, so this is just the meetups that happened in that weekend :P

Also I will be talking about the food on another separate post. Cause I had great food mwahaha.

So I arrived in Singapore on Friday at 1 PM again. I seriously love flying with Scoot now. Cause I think it has a sweet timing for the flights to and from Singapore haha. My flight was at 9:45 AM and by arriving at 1 it would mean I get to check in the hotel straight away when I arrive at the hotel whoop! Reached the hotel at 2-ish I think and rested for a while before heading out to... That's another post HAHAHA. And then I met Kai and Candy for dinner at Empress, which is at Asian Civilisation Museum.

Thanks for the dinner Kai and Candy! And thanks for feeling old together haha

It's great to meet Kai again! Haven't met her since April last year where we met for Nic's wedding. And it's always a good time meeting with them. Talking about jobs, and all things random. Can't believe next year will mark the 10th year that we know each other. And meeting with them is always a great time. They're one of the few people I can openly talk about things. So thank you for the dinner Kai and Candy! And thank you for feeling old together haha. I hope to catch you soon again!

I went back to the hotel after that to crash cause I was really tired.

Us at Parkbench Deli :D

The next morning I met up with Tacy and Jolene for brunch! Great to see Jolene again too, I last met her on April 2018 too when I went for Nic's wedding. Sharon and Weilun couldn't make it as they have work, catch you both again when I'm back ok! :) Went to meet at Parkbench Deli at Tanjong Pagar and it's really a nice quaint cafe. And we also had some Acai at another cafe nearby. 

It's a pretty cool afternoon walking along Tanjong Pagar, I don't know when was the last time that I went there. Anyway it's nice meeting Jolene and Tacy again! We always talk about so many things and it's great to catch up with each other again. Hope the next time we meet, the 4 of us can reunite!

After that I went to shop for things to bring back, and went back to the hotel to do some work (yes, I brought my laptop to this trip haha) and also do some packing up. I kinda failed cause my plan was to wake up earlier on Saturday morning to do work but I ended up waking up late! That's why I decided to do work before I head out again haha. Took the train to Jurong to meet Nivedha and Saeyeoh!

3 of us reunited again! Hello Dr Niv :P 

I'm so happy that I get to finally meet Nivedha again! After 6 long years. Well we did try to make plans to meet up but whenever I'm back (or she's back), either of us won't be in Singapore haha. So yep I'm happy to be able to meet her again. And it's so cool that I get to call her Dr Nivedha now haha. I know you told me not to call you with a Dr but hey just wanna tell you I'm proud to call you a Doctor! I wish you all the very best for your future endeavours :)

The last time Saeyeon, Nivedha and I met was 3 years ago, when the two of them sent me off at the airport when I returned to Singapore in August 2013. Well it has taken us so long and I'm really happy that we finally get to meet again. Pretty crazy to think so many things happened in these 6 years.

After that I went to Genting Hotel Jurong for Jes' wedding! I went earlier to help out Ade and the others but turned out most of the things were done haha. Okay another post for the whole wedding :P

As for my last day it was a pretty chill day for me. Another failed attempt to wake up earlier hahaha. I wanted to actually go to the temple in the morning for the Sunday puja. Also it was new moon day on Sunday! But yep, I woke up late again and decided not to go heh. I went to try Kind Kones instead as recommended by Neal and yes the vegan ice cream is so yummy! Will definitely come back.

Reunion of the Biomedders haha

After doing some last minute shopping I went back to City Hall to meet with Ying Zhi, Rebekah and Syazwani for a late lunch! Finally met Rebekah again after 6 years too haha. And Ying Zhi after 5. Oh gosh I feel really old, has it been that long :O Anyway had an enjoyable lunch at a vegan restaurant in the newly renovated Funan (thanks YZ for the recommendation!).

So yes, it was indeed a wonderful weekend in Singapore filled with reunions and fun! At the same time... I feel really old, with the fact that I'm attending Jes' wedding, when it felt like yesterday when we were still in Tanglin! Well time flies, and no one can stop it from moving forward eh.

I look forward to the next trip to Singapore. Hopefully I can meet with the people that I missed this time round. And as usual, Singapore you're always constantly changing really. Alright see you when I see you again everyone! Thank you for the wonderful (and short) weekend in Singapore! :)

What Does It Take

This is my current earworm since September actually. I really love this song. It somehow made me think and feel about the past. Great song to listen to at 4 AM in the morning.

Why Blogtober

Right maybe to kick things off, let me write about why I decided to take part in this year's Blogtober. 

Well to begin with, I made a goal to myself to write at least 100 entries in this year, just like every other year. I'm not sure why but this hasn't been going well for 2019 haha. Usually I'll hit a 100 by September-ish but whew, it's really difficult somehow! Things get quite busier this year and somehow I'm just kind of losing my mood to blog at night. Or at least not as often as the previous years.

It seems like everytime I returned to my room after dinner, all I want to do is just to rest. Not do anything. I don't feel like blogging or even scrolling through my social media! I simply lay on my bed and do nothing haha. Or sometimes I would watch YouTube videos and that's it.

I'm not exactly sure what leads to this. Perhaps it's the sub-conscious thought that I have "reached" my aim of blogging for 10 years last year. And thus I feel a but uninspired to blog as often, as I don't have another goal haha. And little did I know this would lead me to failing my aim of blogging 100 posts a year. But fear not, we will hit the number for sure mwahaha. I hope so... 

Generally I don't like the idea of blogging everyday. I tried it once and it wasn't a good experience cause I feel like I was rather "forced" to blog every day. But well I'm taking up this challenge, and this time round I'm making some plans to carry out this challenge! Blogging prompts sound fun. And I have a few posts that I am already planning to write so yep. Not as "forced" as I'd imagined I guess.

Alright that's all for this second Blogtober post. I will see you tomorrow.

Blogtober 2019!

Hello and welcome to Blogtober 2019. This is my first time participating in this haha. Well at the rate I'm going, I don't think I'll accomplish my goal of blogging 100 posts in this year. So I decided to join the Blogtober event by blogging every single day in this month of October! No one is probably going to read my blog but hey I'm just joining in the fun and to also accomplish my goal heh.

Okay to begin this Blogtober, I wanted to write a list of post ideas that I can write. But I think it's gonna take a long time to fill them up in one night haha so I will add more as we go along the month. I am not going to write like full posts for every post. I might share music, photos, recipes whatever.

Okay here goes some of the ideas for Blogtober 2019!

1. Share a recently discovered music

2. My favourite music of 2019

3. Post about my recent trip to Singapore

4. Vegan foods that I ate in Singapore

5. Share a recipe of a food that I like

6. My plastic-reduction journey of 2019

7. Bullet journal journey of 2019

8. Random photos I shot in October

9. Some film photos I took in Singapore

10. Videos/documentary I found on YouTube

And lots and lots and lots of blogging prompts HAHAHA.

Okay that's all for this first post of Blogtober 2019. I will add more along the way when the ideas pop out! Wish me luck, and may the blogging odds be ever in my favour haha. See you tomorrow.