Emptiness

One day without my late dog feels pretty much empty. Everything around my house reminds me of her and it sucks, a lot. Like how I would feed her every dinner time, cause she would ask me for it. The red rug where she would sleep in the room. How she would sleep beside my room waiting for me to wake up, and join me for breakfast (where she'll ask for food, again).

But I let her go. I know I have to.

I was just watching documentaries about Buddhism and how impermanence is being brought to topic. Yet here I am, acting like as if I cannot accept impermanence. Well I have to. I come across with a Tibetan saying which goes like this:

"Your breath is now still. No warmth to your skin. Do not be afraid. Everyone before you has died. You cannot stay, any more than a baby can stay forever in the womb. Leave behind all you know, all you love. Leave behind pain and suffering. This is what death is."

Which I take from a video about Tibetan sky burial here: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylzMXJwCCpM

So yes, maybe that's how death feel like. But that sentence in the middle about us, not being able to stay any more than a baby can stay forever in the womb makes me shudder. How true is that. Everyone has their time, and my dog's time was last night. So I have to accept that because no one is born an immortal here. We have to go somewhere after this right.

Anyway it's been raining here and weather's getting really cold. The monsoon wind starts to blow which marks the arrival of Chinese New Year. Another Chinese New Year is coming and going. I think time's flying quite quickly. It's the 12th of January already! 

Big plans coming up this year. Big plans. Will make it happen because no one else will!